The thing that got under my skin was a comment that said how irritated someone was when people posted on their facebook walls about how awesome their husband is. They went on to say that it's been proven that the people that do this have failing marriages (not an exact quote, since I can't remember which blog this was on, but it's pretty close to the main idea). I am just going to go ahead and call BS on this! While I don't always appreciate super gushy, sappy posts on a daily basis from people I don't think that such a blanket statement about failing marriages connected to social media updates applies or is at all accurate.
Shouldn't people feel like it's okay to mention how awesome their husband (or wife) is on social media without feeling like their marriage is under scrutiny? MANY people post on social media about every little thing in their life. Sometimes it's a little TMI for me, but that's okay, I just try to laugh and remember that not everyone thinks like I do. Since people post about every aspect of their life, why would you expect them to leave out what should be the most important person in their life? My friends post about how proud they are of their kids and how much they love them, why shouldn't they feel comfortable posting about how much they love their spouse and how wonderful they are? Does this commentator really think that all these people have terrible marriages?
I have made a few posts on facebook in the past about how much I love my husband or how proud I am of him for some accomplishment he has achieved, or how I was reminded of just how awesome the guy I married is. Sometimes these happen on a normal day but these also happen after my hubby has done something super spectacular or gone out of his way to do something special for me or they happen on our anniversary when I remember just why this guy captured my heart.
I DON'T post such things in an effort to convince myself or anyone else that my marriage is better than it is. Nor do I know anyone who would do such a bizarre thing. The friends I have who post about their marriage or their spouse have strong marriages and want to share how happy they are (And I don't have many facebook friends that I don't know in person at least fairly well).
I love my husband and am super proud of him. He is a talented guy and can achieve anything he sets his mind too. He's always learning new skills and talents just because he finds new things that he is interested in. He is the funniest guy I know and can make me laugh in ways no one else can and he just "gets me". He is a super hard worker and makes many sacrifices so that he can finish school and still provide for our family. He will never really know how much I admire and love him.
My husband is a wonderful, inspiring guy, I love him, and I will shout it to the world and be proud of him! And if you think my marriage is on the rocks because I am proud of my husband and not afraid to share it then perhaps you should come over to my house and have dinner with my crazy fun little family and get a little change of perspective. So come on over, we don't bite! :)
What do you guys think? Is this way of thinking common and I've just been in the dark about it? Do you post on social media about your spouse?
Hey there :) First of all, I doubt that there have been any legitimate studies on linking posts about husbands/marriage to marriage failings. But I agree! I think there is definitely a time and place to brag on our husbands! I don't do it on a daily basis, and I tend to find that a little over the top, but I think when your husband accomplishes something or does something special that it is totally normal to brag on them! I also don't think just because someone posts daily about how "awesome" their spouse is that it means their marriage is on the rocks, because it's those same people who tend to post every detail about their life on Facebook... checking in right and left, posting selfies, and whatever else. That's not my cup of tea, but certainly these people aren't "failing at life" too, our generation is just a lot more public with their lives.
ReplyDeleteThanks, it's good to know that I'm not alone on this one!!
DeleteI think saying that it means a marriage is failing is a little extreme. I don't think there's anything wrong posting affection or congratulations for your spouse via social media. (At least, I do it.) I think sometimes it might come off as boastful--but that's social media. It's hard to nail down the tone of something written.
ReplyDeleteI totally agree. Without witnessing the inflections in people's voices, facial expressions, etc... the written word can very easily be misunderstood.
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